Sometimes you're the windshield...

Today, I'm the bug...

Well, that's a lie, tonight - I guess...

So, today I had an awesome day shopping with my mom.  First we picked out material for her to make Easter Dresses for the girl cousins and curtains for the baby's room.  We could have stayed in Jo-Ann Fabrics for hours... In fact, I don't know why we didn't shop around more... But, maybe that will give us an excuse to go again soon.

Then we went to the Vera Bradley outlet and I picked out my birthday gift!  I got the Metropolitan bag that I've been eying for quite some time!  I love it...

Next we had to hit carters and check out the baby clothes.  We bought Madison a "Big Sister" t-shirt, because she has a long sleeve shirt, but will need a t-shirt for when the baby comes in the spring!

After that we had lunch together and hit Kohls.  They don't have a Kohls near my mom, so she always likes to get there when she can... and really, who doesn't!

While we were out though, I got one of those dreaded emails from my boss.  You know, "we need to talk about this"... email.  Seriously, why do people do that through email?  And on your one day off where they know you're celebrating and enjoying the day.  So, I was in a panic all day...
The email stemmed from another email I was waiting to hear back on - so I kept checking my email on my phone to try an avoid any further issue with my boss.  Knowing/Hoping it was an easy fix, but still worrying.
Don't get me wrong, I didn't let it totally ruin my day - I just hate that I was preoccupied with work bs when I should have been completely work-free enjoying the day with my mom.

Later in the day - that issue was resolved, and what I had hoped would happen, did- so I was able to make the whole thing "not a situation".

Then at night, I happened to check email again (mainly because I hate walking into work with a huge inbox full of emails that I wont have time to get to) and I had another email basically asking if I did my job correctly?
seriously?
I'm not sure how it was intended to make me feel, but I can tell you, I was in tears.  Basically feeling like I had been punched in the stomach....

Of course I did what I was told to do - the issue was actually caused by someone else not doing THEIR job... and lucky for me, I had email proof of that - but still - my integrity was questioned and I felt quite hurt and distrusted.

There are most days when I love my work.  Today is one of those days where I do not feel valued and I wasn't even at work to receive this treatment... that's what sucks.

I'm not sure if my boss reads this blog, I'm pretty sure she doesn't - and I'm not saying anything bad about her - what I'm saying is how her actions made me feel.  And its hard to say face to face - "when you emailed me, you made me feel like crap.." So I don't know that I'll necessarily be able to address the issue... but it just was a pretty crappy thing to have happen ...   especially during and after such a great day with my mom.
I also am pretty sure that she's not intending to hurt me or cause me so much stress - but clearly it does...

I know that I should not read email at home or on my phone... for these exact reasons... but sometimes it does help to alleviate stress while at work... In this case, it completely added to stress that didn't need to be there...
And yes, I do know that I can be overly sensitive and take things way too personal.  That's part of my issue with people at work - I care too much what they think and want to please them.  I have to realize that I just can't please everyone all the time.

I also need to not let work get me so upset.
I have an amazing husband, a great daughter, a wonderful mother and father and just so many fantastic family members that all make my life complete.... why do I let work take over and stress me out?!?

A lot of times I wonder about another job and then I have to remind myself that it is probably this way everywhere - there are good days and bad days at work... My goal at my work is to help students, to make them feel comfortable... if I am doing that, I'm doing a good job - and if my efforts are in that direction, than I'm doing my job correctly.  I don't need anyone's approval or pat-on-the-back about it...

Thanks for letting me vent... I try not to do that on here, but sometimes I just need to get it out...