Milestones...

I don't post much about my girls' growth and development, but I am afraid if I don't, I'll easily forget it.
I just had to pull out Madison's baby book to find out when her first tooth came in because I honestly had no recollection!  (It was at 8 months, btw).

So, I figured I'd update you all on where they are at and what they're into lately.

Madison just turned 5.  I can not believe I have a 5 year old.  She just lights up my days and she is so smart. She picks up on everything and has an amazing memory.  I literally do not have to have a shopping list when we go grocery shopping, because as long as I recite what we need before we go, she will remember it!

She is in a scared/anxious phase though.  Everything makes her nervous.  We nicknamed her "Nelly" and she thinks it is hysterical!! I called her Nervous Nelly once and Nosey Nelly another time and so the tern Nelly stuck and she loves it!! She wants to know everything you're talking about - she's super nosey - but its just because she is curious... so curious about everything.  And she learns so much by being so curious, so its actually really good!
The nervous part... oh my... she's nervous that I'm going to hit a car (that is yards away) when backing out of a parking spot, nervous that Isabella will fall over (she always does and it's no big deal)!  Nervous if Ryan leaves the room (when I'm not home) she'll call out "Daddy... DADDY!!!" thinking he left her alone (ummm... he would never do that!! I've been tempted before, but never him!!! -i kid!)   I used to be the exact same way, which is so weird to me that it's not something I've

But aside from that, she's super into reading right now.  And she's getting it!! For a while, she would say "How do you spell dog" and I would say, "Sound it out, what letter makes the 'duh' sound?"... and she would  respond with something like "S"... so I knew she wasn't understanding it yet.
But lately, she'll ask if she can read the first page of her nightly stories - and she gets the sounds and most of the words correct!!  It's amazing to see her learning practically right before my eyes!!


She so sweet too.  She constantly tells me I'm pretty and she loves being with me, she loves hugging me and brushing my hair or laying on the couch with me.  I tell her all the time, "Promise you'll always like me... because when you're a teenager, I might have to tell you that you can't do a lot of things you want to and you may not like my answers, but promise me that you'll know I am only doing whats best for you"... she laughs and promises!! It's really cute!
She is an incredible big sister... Sometimes I'll have Izzy sitting in her saucer while I'm doing something in the other room and immediately Maddie comes and sits with Izzy, and if she has to go to the bathroom or leave the room, she'll say, "Mom can you watch Izzy, I just have to run and..." she doesn't like leaving her by herself for even a minute!

Then there's my 7 month old that is seriously growing before my eyes!! The reason I had to look up when Maddie got her first tooth, is because Izzy's is just starting to poke through.  I couldn't remember nursing when Maddie had teeth, but I did apparently (only for a month or so)...
Izzy has been sitting up on her own for a little over a month.  She took her first ride in a shopping cart the other day (she could  have done so earlier, but we didn't have one of those covers for it so I just kept her in the front carrier... My mom is incredible though, and whipped one up for us one weekend, so now we are avoiding germs while still riding in style!)

She waves when we wave to her, she claps on command, she laughs at so much!  She eats cereal and squash and sweet potatoes.  We're trying other foods but this muchkin has the best pukey face and gag going on for new foods!!
She is still solely on breastmilk though - I pump as much as I can at work (because we mix the cereal with breastmilk too.)  It's been challenging to find the time in the day to pump, but I just keep telling myself, one day at a time.  Don't look ahead and think "Oh man, 5 more months" look ahead and say, "I can do this again tomorrow"... that has gotten me through 7.5 months, so I guess its a good mentality!!
She is still not sleeping through the night completely.  I get one night here and there, but for the most part, she wakes up at least once (around 3:00am) and then for the day around 6:30am.
I can't complain though - she sleeps from about 7:30pm - 3am-ish and then goes back down after that middle of the night feeding.
I go to bed around 10 or 11pm once the house is picked up a bit so I am averaging 4-5 hours a night (it's tough to get back to sleep once you're up from 3-4am feeding... Many times I just stay up and go for my run.

Overall, I could not ask for better daughters.  I am so blessed and I love waking up to their smiling faces (they both inherited their father's morning-person personality) - Thank God!!

Resolutions...

I don't really make resolutions.  I don't ever stick to them, so they're really just like suggestions and they don't happen at the beginning of every year, they kind of happen when I think about them.

I thought this was funny, this is why I don't do resolutions!!
Image: http://lolzombie.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/updated-new-years-resolutions.jpg

Like, a few months back, I realized that when Maddie was a baby, I just couldn't wait for her to grow.  I loved watching her development that I was so focused on the next thing she was doing that I didn't mind how quickly the baby stages went.

Maddie about 5 days old!

Now that Maddie (will be) 5 (tomorrow!!) I find myself sad that she's growing so fast and especially sad that Isabella is too.  I don't love all things baby - I never have.  But I do love how Isabella snuggles up to me and I am the one person who can soothe her when all others can not.
I love that Madison thinks I am pretty much the coolest thing there is.  I said to her the other day, "Promise you'll always love my hugs and smothering kisses"  of course she said "I will, I love snuggling and hugging you!"  But I couldn't help but think - one day she'll be like 15 and think that I'm not cool anymore.  That made me so sad.

I don't think I ever went through an "I hate my parents stage" but I certainly remember thinking, "They don't get it - they don't know what's 'in' and what's 'cool' or not"... I had enough stacked up against me with my peers, I just wanted to wear the trendy clothes and do the cool things...
I hope I can find the right balance of that for my girls.  There's conforming and fitting in, and there's individuality and expression.  I'd like them to know the difference and feel comfortable with themselves despite what their peers are doing.  I hope I can instill that in them and still be "cool" while doing so.  I think I had decent examples so I hope I can pull it off!!

Anyways, back to my resolutions suggestions for myself.  I'm always trying to be a better wife and mom.  I'm not boasting or exaggerating when I tell you that Ryan is an amazing husband.  I'd tell you he's perfect but you wouldn't believe me so I wont use that term.  He is not only an amazing husband, he's an incredible father too.  I know Madison is enamored with him and once Izzy knows more, she will be too!  He has great instincts, is such a hands on dad and doesn't care if other guys think he's cheezy or whatnot.  I strive to be a compatible mom for my girls... They've already got an amazing dad, I am trying to make sure they have "amazing parents"  (and I used amazing a lot in this paragraph!)

While thanking God for him in my life, I often pray that I can be the wife that Ryan deserves in return.  It's not a natural thing for me.  I don't always remember to kiss him when I walk through the door - I often talk about my day before I remember to ask him about his, I don't think to do nice things for him randomly... so I work hard at it.  I'm trying to make it more natural.

Another suggestion for myself is to not obsess over my weight or my eating as much.  Madison notices these things now and I do NOT want to pass on my weight issues to her.  Right now, she loves her body, loves her hair and the way she looks and she knows she is smart and beautiful.  I want to keep it that way.  I want her to value her brains AND her looks (lets be honest, I'd love to say that her brains are all that matters, but society will show her otherwise, so as long as I teach her the correct order, I think I'm doing ok!)
I am pretty happy with my body right now.  My stomach needs toning but to be fair, I had a child 7 months ago and haven't really worked at losing the weight.  I'll get there.  And I need to have patience with the process.

So that's my goal for this year.  Sure I have other things I'd like to do: read more, spend more time with extended family and friends, blog way more often, pay off my credit card debt, remodel the bathroom and replace the kitchen floor... but those may or may not happen - I don't want to feel like crap for not fulfilling some resolution.

I also have made it my life goal to appreciate my blessings.  And I really think I do that well.  I know how blessed I am and I am so thankful to God for that!

A Day in the Life of this Working Mom

It feels like I haven't blogged in forever, but I have a good excuse... I'm a working mom of two now... and this stuff is busy!!  So when I was thinking that I never blog, I thought, "well, that's because I have no time to blog"... and tried to think of when the next time I could sit and write something... then I thought that helping you to see my typical day might explain why I haven't blogged in a while...

3:45am - Isabella wakes, hungry.  Sleepily, I feed her (on one side) and after about 20 minutes of eating, she falls asleep and I put her back in her cradle.
4:15am - I'm still full on one side, so I must get up an pump.
4:45am - I finish pumping and bagging and cleaning everything up and if it is a rest day for running, I head back to bed.  If it is a run day - I'm up for the day!
I start to get my things ready for the day and at 5am, Ryan's alarm goes off.
While he goes for his run, I do abs...
When he gets back from his run at 5:30, I get dressed and go for my run.
5:45am ish - I run three miles.
6:20am ish - I get back and get in the shower.
Once out of the shower, Madison is up, I make her breakfast.  While getting ready, Maddie eats and/or entertains Isabella (if she has woken up again).
By 7:20am, I am trying to get Maddie to decide what to wear (some days this is a much longer process than others - she's in a wicked Diva stage!)
7:35am ish - I finish getting lunches ready (Ryan starts this process, I just get anything out of the refrigerator and put the lunches in our bags for the day).
745am ish- I brush my teeth, fill my water bottle and feed Miss Isabella one last time before I head out.
8:15am- my mother-in-law shows up.  I hand Isabella over, give her Zantac
and race to finish getting ready.
8:30am - we are off.  It takes about 20 minutes to get to Bridgewater and I love my time with Maddie in the car!  We play I Spy and the slogan game...(we make up slogans for the day) like "when Mumma doesn't run in the morning, she usually forgets everything she needs" -I don't remember when this game started, but Maddie loves it!
By 9:00am I have dropped her off at school and am walking into my office to "start my day".
9:30am I close my office door and pump for the first time of the day.
My day consists of meetings, solving issues, preparing for other potential issues and I try to fit four pump sessions in there somewhere.
At 5pm, my day is done at work.
I walk in the door at 5:30, drop my bags and feed Isabella.  I try to remember to use the restroom at work before I leave because there literally is no time for me to go before feeding her!
Ryan is pretty amazing and will have dinner just about ready when I walk in, so most days I feed izzy at the table while we all eat.
If Isabella finishes eating in time, I clean up from dinner - if not, Ryan does it all.
Ryan and I take turns each night with the tub and stories routine.  On my night, after dinner 6:15pm is tubby time.  I tubby the girls, get teeth and hair brushed and read stories and Maddie is in bed by 7:15 or 7:30pm.
Many nights I am feeding Isabella while reading stories or Ryan has to do stories so I can feed her.
I feed, then in about an hour, I give her some cereal, which does not help her sleep- contrary to popular belief!!
Ryan is in grad school, so he either helps me do everything or I have to force him to go downstairs and do his schoolwork.
Most nights Isabella and I are on the couch nursing from about 7:30 or 8 until  10 when we all go to bed.
For the most part, Isabella will sleep from 10pm to 3 or 4am... And then our day starts over.

Notice I didn't mention laundry or cleaning anywhere in there... I used to fully clean the house each night after dinner/before bed.  It drives me crazy that I can't do that anymore.  I clean when/if I can.  Ryan does it otherwise

So that's the reason for lack of posting... Even as it is, right now it's 3:49am and I'm pumping - so this was the only time I have had to post!

And just because I don't like a blog post without pictures... Here are some from Isabella's birth that we didn't share with the general public...

Photo Book

I got a coupon for a free Photo Book, and I've done one each year for Madison except for this past year.  SO, I decided, it was a pretty big year.  Well, then I didn't have all the pictures I wanted to post of the whole year, so I just did the summer.  I'm pretty excited and I like the way it came out.  The book is usually $29.99 with $8 shipping and handling.  So, a $37 purchase just cost me $8.  I can't say no to that.

If you want your free book, use the code SUMMERBOOK - but you have to do it before Wednesday, so go quickly!!

 

Click here to view this photo book larger

You'll love Shutterflys award-winning photo books. Try it today.

Admitting defeat...

I am just not good at keeping this thing updated!  I've admitted it, and now I'm moving on...

I wanted to post a lot on my maternity leave, but it felt like there was never any time.  Eleven weeks went by so fast.  I've been back to work for two weeks already and I'm swamped with work.  I literally have to mark off time in my calendar for lunch and pumping or I'll get scheduled into back to back meetings and not do either.

Speaking of pumping - that is my challenge so far.  Thank God Isabella takes a bottle well - because she really has no choice.  Pumping at work is interesting.  I have to close my door and everyone in the outer office knows that if my door is closed I'm doing "motherly things".  I somehow feel dirty when pumping though.  I know it's completely normal and necessary, but it just isn't convenient and it takes up about a half hour of each day (I pump twice, so 15 minutes each time).

It's also weird having someone call my office and talk to me while I'm indisposed.  But, my beautiful baby is totally worth it.

Let me tell you about my girls at this point in their lives.
Madison is 4 years and 8 months old.  She's amazing.  For the most part (and I mean most, there are rarely times where this isn't so) she is very polite, funny, and well tempered.  She loves being around people - always asks if we can have people over for dinner and if we're going to see friends.  She loves to dance and sing and is pretty good at both!  She's starting to read - using sight words and making up whatever she can't figure out.  She is obsessed with chapsticks, headbands, flip flops, tank tops and does her hair and changes her clothes about four times each day.
She's a diva, and I did not do it!

Best of all - she's an amazing big sister.  She entertains her for me when I'm getting ready in the morning, she lets me know if she's crying when I'm in the shower.  She tries to calm her down in the car and she is very protective of her.

And my Isabella, my 3 month old bundle of cuddly love.  Isabella is such a great baby.  She is on baby zantac which makes her so much happier than she was a month ago.  Prior to this, she would scream nightly for about 3 hours at a time.  Now, she has occassional fussy times, but she's a baby, that's normal.
She is my sleeper - thank GOD!  With Madison, she just would not sleep at night.  She would rest a lot during the day and cry almost all night long.  I even remember someone telling us we needed to flip her - so we did.  We literally held her one way before bed, and turnred her upside down and back around.  It didn't work.  She cried at night for almost 9 months.
Isabella on the other hand has slept at night since the day we brought her home from the hospital.  THANK YOU GOD for that!! I mean it, I know how it is the other way, and I am so blessed.
She goes to sleep around 10:30pm and wakes up sometime after 4am, which is fine with me - I get up to run after 5am, so most mornings it works out perfectly.  I nurse her and then head out.

She is so happy, almost always smiling and she even laughs (at Ryan, but soon I'll get her to laugh at me too!)  She takes the bottle so well, but definitely lets me know I was missed when I get home from work.  She pretty much nurses off and on all night long from 5pm -10:30pm on weekdays.  Which, I really don't mind!! :)

She loves her sister.  Madison only needs to be in the room for Isabella to light up and look around the room with a smile on her face, trying to find her big sister.
She is starting to teethe, so she's drooling like crazy and chomping on her hands non-stop.  Even with a drooly mouth and slobbery hands, she's incredibly cute.

I just feel so blessed. Thank you Lord for these two amazing blessings.  And thank you for Ryan - the most amazing best friend and father I could have ever dreamed of.

Vacation

Considering I have to take vacation time for my maternity leave, I figured why not enjoy it and get the most out of it as I can...

Last week we spent the week in New Hampshire on Lake Winnepesaukee in my parents' friends' house.  It was a great week, with great weather.

We spent a good deal of time in the lake and one day we went to Story Land... My parents were troopers and did the rides with Maddie.

Madison wasn't so sure about this ride and I think my mom took the brunt of most of the splashes!









 
  The flume (Bamboo Shoots) was another one that Maddie looked scared stiff on, but she hasn't stopped talking about it since!









I wore Isabella in the moby wrap for most of the day - but there were a few rides I could do with her, so that was fun.

Madison was beyond excited the whole day.  She didn't ask for anything, she didn't whine (it was pretty warm and then there was a crazy thunderstorm with torrential rain in teh middle of the day which threatened us leaving) but she was excellent the whole day!)

There was Cinderella's castle and she was so happy to be able to meet Cinderella!! We honestly almost didn't get to go to the castle because of the rain, but I told my parents that I NEEDED to let her go to the castle before we leave (when we were going to leave due to the rain) and I am so glad we did.  Not only did we make it JUST IN TIME for the meet and greet, but the rain stopped and the sun came out after we were done.  Totally avoided an epic fail as a mom and I am thrilled about that!!

She was in her glory hugging a princess!

Ryan and Dad ran around in the mist hut to cool off!

My aunt and uncle who live in NH came and spent the day with us on Tuesday.  Maddie has only met them once, but she was not shy at all and loved telling them all about the previous day, at Story Land.

She got out the brochure and map to show them exactly what we did and where we went!! 

 

 

Of course, Ryan and I had to find a brewery (it's our thing I guess, wherever we are on vacation, we try to try out new breweries).  We went to two.  Woodstock Brewery, which we had been to before, and Moat Mountain and the beer and food were delish!



All in all, it was a great week.  We've had a great maternity leave so far.  I can not believe I only have 2 weeks left, but am so glad I'm using my time well!

I forgot...

Just how stressful a newborn can be...
I forgot how frustrating it is to not know why your baby is crying or how to solve whatever it is that is causing these fits.
I forgot how tough it is to have a colicky baby...
I forgot how stressful breastfeeding a colicky baby is... (they act hungry, eat for a minute, then pull off, and cry uncontrollably - thus your milk supply is hampered).
I forgot what it felt like to be completely exhausted...

You might think that if I did remember all of that, I wouldn't have had another...
Not true...
Not true because I didn't forget how wonderful it is to have that little baby snuggle up on  your chest.
I didn't forget how great it feels to have that baby light up when you walk in the room...
I didn't forget how incredibly adorable it is when my baby holds on to me with both hands while she is nursing...
I didn't forget what a miracle it is that Ryan and I created this little person together, and she is a complete product of our unfailing love.
And I didn't forget that unconditional love that can only come from a baby who knows only what I have shown her.

I am so blessed.

I can even find blessings in her four consecutive hours of crying - at least it stops at midnight and I was able to sleep from 12:30am-4:15am straight... and then she fell right back asleep and dint' wake up until 7:15am.
For that, I am so thankful.
I do know what it is like to have a baby cry all night long (Madison cried 12-8am non-stop for a few nights) so I will be very grateful and thankful for what I have.

After all, how can you be upset when you look at this love: